is a convincing, practised liar and when called to account, will make up anything spontaneously to fit their needs at that moment
has a Jekyll and Hyde nature - is vile, vicious and vindictive in private, but innocent and charming in front of witnesses; no-one can (or wants to) believe this individual has a vindictive nature - only the current target of the serial bully's aggression sees both sides; whilst the Jekyll side is described as "charming" and convincing enough to deceive personnel, management and a tribunal, the Hyde side is frequently described as "evil"; Hyde is the real person, Jekyll is an act
excels at deception and should never be underestimated in their capacity to deceive
uses excessive charm and is always plausible and convincing when peers, superiors or others are present (charm can be used to deceive as well as to cover for lack of empathy)
is glib, shallow and superficial with plenty of fine words and lots of form - but there's no substance
is possessed of an exceptional verbal facility and will outmanoeuvre most people in verbal interaction, especially at times of conflict
is often described as smooth, slippery, slimy, ingratiating, fawning, toadying, obsequious, sycophantic
relies on mimicry, repetition and regurgitation to convince others that he or she is both a "normal" human being and a tough dynamic manager, as in extolling the virtues of the latest management fads and pouring forth the accompanying jargon
is unusually skilled in being able to anticipate what people want to hear and then saying it plausibly
cannot be trusted or relied upon
fails to fulfil commitments
is emotionally retarded with an arrested level of emotional development; whilst language and intellect may appear to be that of an adult, the bully displays the emotional age of a five-year-old
is emotionally immature and emotionally untrustworthy
exhibits unusual and inappropriate attitudes to sexual matters, sexual behaviour and bodily functions; underneath the charming exterior there are often suspicions or hints of sex discrimination and sexual harassment, perhaps also sexual dysfunction, sexual inadequacy, sexual perversion, sexual violence or sexual abuse
in a relationship, is incapable of initiating or sustaining intimacy
holds deep prejudices (eg against the opposite gender, people of a different sexual orientation, other cultures and religious beliefs, foreigners, etc - prejudiced people are unvaryingly unimaginative) but goes to great lengths to keep this prejudicial aspect of their personality secret
is self-opinionated and displays arrogance, audacity, a superior sense of entitlement and sense of invulnerability and untouchability
has a deep-seated contempt of clients in contrast to his or her professed compassion
is a control freak and has a compulsive need to control everyone and everything you say, do, think and believe; for example, will launch an immediate personal attack attempting to restrict what you are permitted to say if you start talking knowledgeably about psychopathic personality or antisocial personality disorder in their presence - but aggressively maintains the right to talk (usually unknowledgeably) about anything they choose; serial bullies despise anyone who enables others to see through their deception and their mask of sanity
displays a compulsive need to criticise whilst simultaneously refusing to value, praise and acknowledge others, their achievements, or their existence
shows a lack of joined-up thinking with conversation that doesn't flow and arguments that don't hold water
flits from topic to topic so that you come away feeling you've never had a proper conversation
refuses to be specific and never gives a straight answer
is evasive and has a Houdini-like ability to escape accountability
undermines and destroys anyone who the bully perceives to be an adversary, a potential threat, or who can see through the bully's mask
is adept at creating conflict between those who would otherwise collate incriminating information about them
is quick to discredit and neutralise anyone who can talk knowledgeably about antisocial or sociopathic behaviors
may pursue a vindictive vendetta against anyone who dares to held them accountable, perhaps using others' resources and contemptuous of the damage caused to other people and organisations in pursuance of the vendetta
is also quick to belittle, undermine, denigrate and discredit anyone who calls, attempts to call, or might call the bully to account
gains gratification from denying people what they are entitled to
is highly manipulative, especially of people's perceptions and emotions (eg guilt)
poisons peoples' minds by manipulating their perceptions
when called upon to share or address the needs and concerns of others, responds with impatience, irritability and aggression
is arrogant, haughty, high-handed, and a know-all
often has an overwhelming, unhealthy and narcissistic attention-seeking need to portray themselves as a wonderful, kind, caring and compassionate person, in contrast to their behaviour and treatment of others; the bully sees nothing wrong with their behavior and chooses to remain oblivious to the discrepancy between how they like to be seen and how they are seen by others
is spiritually dead although may loudly profess some religious belief or affiliation
is mean-spirited, officious, and often unbelievably petty
is mean, stingy, and financially untrustworthy
is greedy, selfish, a parasite and an emotional vampire
is always a taker and never a giver
is convinced of their superiority and has an overbearing belief in their qualities of leadership but cannot distinguish between leadership (maturity, decisiveness, assertiveness, co-operation, trust, integrity) and bullying (immaturity, impulsiveness, aggression, manipulation, distrust, deceitfulness)
often fraudulently claims qualifications, experience, titles, entitlements or affiliations which are ambiguous, misleading, or bogus
often misses the semantic meaning of language, misinterprets what is said, sometimes wrongly thinking that comments of a satirical, ironic or general negative nature apply to him or herself
knows the words but not the song
is constantly imposing on others a false reality made up of distortion and fabrication
sometimes displays a seemingly limitless demonic energy especially when engaged in attention-seeking activities or evasion of accountability and is often a committeeaholic or apparent workaholic
The profile above covers the most commonly-reported behaviours of serial bullies. From casework I've been able to identify four primary types of serial bully:
The Attention-Seeker
Motivation: to be the centre of attention
Mindset: control freak, manipulation, narcissism
Malice: medium to high; when held accountable, very high
emotionally immature
selectively friendly - is sickly sweet to some people, rude and offhand to others, and ignores the rest
is cold and aggressive towards anyone who sees them for what they really are or exposes their strategies for gaining attention
overfriendly with their new target, especially in the initial stages of a new working relationship
overhelpful, ditto
overgenerous, ditto
manipulative of people's perceptions, but in an amateur and childish manner
manipulative with guilt, ditto
sycophantic, fawning, toadying
uses flattery to keep a person in authority on side
everything is a drama, usually a poor-me drama
prefers not to solve problems in own life so that they can be used and re-used for gaining sympathy and attention
capitalises on issues and uses them as a soapbox for gaining attention
exploits others' suffering and grief as a vehicle for gaining attention
misappropriates others' statements, eg anything which can be misconstrued as politically incorrect, for control and attention-seeking
excusitis, makes excuses for everything
shows a lot of indignation, especially when challenged
lots of self-pity
often as miserable as sin, apart from carefully constructed moments of charm when in the act of deceiving
demanding of others
easily provoked
feigns victimhood when held accountable, usually by bursting into tears or claiming they're the one being bullied and harassed
presents as a false victim when outwitted
may feign exclusion, isolation or persecution
malicious
constantly tries and will do almost anything to be in the spotlight
includes Munchausen Syndrome
the focus of their life is to be the centre of attention
similar to the attention-seeker
is one of life's chronic underperformers and is best described as ineffectual in everything
craves undeserved respect and attention and will go to considerable lengths to acquire them
hangs around the fringes of a profession
not professionally qualified but claims they are a professional because they sit next to a professional or work alongside or near or in the midst of professionals, or provide services to professionals
lacks the ability, competence and professionalism to be a qualified professional
wants so much to be seen as competent professional person but is unable and unwilling to put in the work to achieve this
is unable and unwilling to apply knowledge gained from experience but instead devotes
time and effort to improving skills of deception, manipulation, false claim, denial and projection
may have been rejected by their chosen profession for lack of competence
is spiteful towards and despises anyone who is qualified in the profession from which the bully has been excluded by virtue of lack of competence
is likely to be vilifying the profession they want to belong to or which they're claiming to be part of or which they are claiming to represent
displays a deep-seated envy and jealousy of the professionals that he or she works alongside or claims to serve
harbours a bitter resentment, grudge, distaste and contempt for the professionals that he or she works alongside or claims to serve
is likely to be criticising, condemning, disadvantaging and causing detriment to the professionals he or she works alongside or claims to serve
may seek positions of power over the professionals he or she works alongside or claims to serve, perhaps to facilitate a compulsion to criticise, condemn, disadvantage and cause detriment
is irresistibly drawn to organisations, roles and positions which offer the wannabe power and control over the professionals s/he despises (eg inspection regimes, approval roles, regulatory bodies, ticksheet compliance schemes, political correctness police, trade union official, etc) - and is often described as a talentless jobsworth
when in a position of power associates with and makes alliances with or surrounds him or herself with clones, drones, minions, fellow wannabes, sycophants and brown-nosers
instinctively objects to any suggestion of change, reform, improvement, progress or evolution, but has no viable or positive alternatives of their own
opposes every idea, suggestion, opinion, contribution or reform on principle but has no original, positive, constructive ideas or contributions of his or her own
is likely to plagiarise and steal others' ideas which are then put forward as their own
may place undue emphasis or reliance on an old, minor or irrelevant qualification to bolster their claim of belonging to or deserving to belong to a profession
may claim ambiguous or misleading or bogus or fraudulent qualifications, associations and experience
displays a superior sense of entitlement because they associate with or serve higher performers
emotionally immature
controlling
easily provoked
when challenged is adept at rewriting history to portray themselves as competent, professional and successful, regardless of multiple witnesses and overwhelming evidence to the contrary
quickly and loudly feigns victimhood when exposed and held accountable, often repeatedly and loudly accusing the person holding them accountable of being a bully
when held accountable makes conflicting and contradictory threats and demands (eg demands apology but orders the other person not to communicate with them)
when held accountable makes lots of loud but empty threats (eg of legal action such as libel, slander, defamation etc)
only carries out threats of legal action when in the presence of a superior serial bully, especially a sociopath type
may indulge their jealousy and envy of professionals or those they claim to serve by pursuing vindictive vendettas, sometimes with the help of a superior serial bully, especially a sociopath type
is easily manipulated and controlled by a superior serial bully
female wannabes may be arch bullies (some people might call them puppetmasters or queen bees)
may surround herself with drones of the opposite sex
may exploit some perceived vulnerability in self to ensure drone loyalty
gives the appearance of loyalty to drones but will discard them when they've served their purpose
is likely to have affairs to gain power, status or position
often successful in their narrow field of expertise
regarded as an expert
valued by the employer because s/he brings in the money, status etc
ruthlessly pursues objectives regardless of the cost
ruthless determination to succeed
can be successful over the medium term in their field
task focused
zero people skills
control freak
mainly but not exclusively male
often has a favourite who receives extra attention but who is expected to reciprocate with
sycophancy
favours, protects and promotes non-threatening sycophants whilst marginalizing and
hindering the advancement of those with higher levels of competence, especially in people skills
apt to betray those formerly favoured, especially when the favoured person starts to show independence of thought or action, or starts to receive more attention or become more popular than their mentor
a male Guru in a position of power may exhibit inappropriate sexual conduct
gauche, aggressive and unpleasant but not evil
may not be overtly attention-seeking but dislikes those around them getting more attention than they're getting, or getting attention which doesn't include the bully
selfish, self-centred, self-opinionated, dogmatic and thoughtless and with a tendency to pontificate
apt to throw temper tantrums when things don't go well or can't get their own way
emotionally immature, perhaps emotionless, sometimes cold and frigid
convincingly intellectualises feelings to compensate for emotional immaturity
intelligent (often highly) but lacks common sense
is happy to lie to suit own purposes
can have a rigid routine
does not accept responsibility for their own behavior
blames others for own inadequacies
refuses to recognise that they could have any shortcomings of their own
does not live in the present
usually extremely neat (for example, desk is always clear)
organized (sometimes overly)
tempts fate but always gets away with it
has stereotypical ideas about gender roles (though this may not be expressed consciously)
makes assumptions about others' thoughts
does not follow social rules, for example may display bad table manners in public
appears unable and unwilling to engage in and sustain small talk
seems unaware of the nature and purpose of rapport
seems to exhibit some symptoms similar to autism, although autistic people tend to be shy, introspective and lack manipulative skills and are usually the targets of bullying, not the perpetrators (it's unknown whether there might be a common cause or whether the similarities are just a superficial coincidence) [more on autism]
appears unable to read people and their thoughts and especially feelings
when held accountable exhibits genuine confusion as to why their behaviour is inappropriate
in cases where malice is low or absent the person my be regarded as somewhat avuncular or mildly jovial or charismatic in nature
likes the appearance of normalcy but rejects responsibilities of relationships
is unable to comprehend or meet the emotional needs of others
often puts work and duty above everything, including relationships
makes power plays, for example leaves the room when someone is speaking, or pretends not to hear and constantly asking a person to repeat what they just said, etc
doesn't share information about self (thoughts, insights, etc) and is not open to receiving this type of information from others (allegedly knows it all already)
secretive
possessive of objects and sometimes people
may view people as objects (this enables controlling behaviour of other people)
thinks of self as superior and above the law / rules / regulations etc (these only apply to other people)
uses denial as a defence mechanism
there are likely to be problems with succession
Jekyll & Hyde personality
always charming and beguilingly plausible, especially to those who are capable of protecting or enhancing the sociopath's position
excels at deception (this must never be underestimated, but always is)
excels at evasion of accountability
is extremely and successfully manipulative of people's perceptions and emotions (eg guilt and anger)
silver-tongued, has an extreme verbal facility and can outwit anybody (including a top barrister) in verbal conflict
will often engineer himself or herself into a position of authority as gatekeeper of the organisation and thus the person through whom all information must flow, and the person to whom all requests for services must be referred - which he or she then takes delight in denying
is adept at offering weak and inadequate people the positions of power, control, security, influence or respect that they crave but who lack the necessary competencies to achieve - such people are unaware that their consequent dependence on the sociopath makes them permanent manipulatees, pawns and expendable agents of harassment
identifies those essential to the sociopath's survival and manipulates their perceptions them by making them feel special and thus obligated to reciprocate with support and protection
manipulates others into making fools of themselves in situations where they cannot back down or from which they cannot withdraw - these people become increasingly susceptible to further manipulation and are then trapped as pawns in the sociopath's game
is likely to be surrounded by people who, having been subjected to control, manipulation and punishment by the sociopath, look wretched and who start to exhibit behaviour best described as disordered, dysfunctional, sullen, aggressive, defensive, hostile, retaliatory, counterproductive or cult-like and for whom disbelief, disavowal and denial are instinctive responses
creates an environment where levels of denial are so great that those involved are oblivious of the foolishness and self-evident absurdity of their denials when presented with the facts, with the result that non-involved observers are led to question whether such levels of denial merit psychiatric intervention
is contemptuous of disrepute to their organisation and of collateral damage and of the destructive consequences for all direct and indirect parties
is always surrounded by and leaves behind a trail of dysfunctional organisations, destroyed businesses, ruined careers, stress breakdowns and unexplained suicides
despite a trail of devastation to individuals, organisations, families and communities, the actions of a socialised psychopath may go undetected or unrecognised for years
a history of conducting frivolous, vexatious and malicious legal actions, especially (but not exclusively) against anyone who can recognise the sociopath for what he is
only after the sociopath is exposed and relieved of position, or they move on, can the full depth of their destructive behaviour be fathomed and the consequences calculated
is skilled at identifying, undermining, discrediting, neutralising and destroying anyone who can see through the sociopath's mask of sanity
at all times restricts the actions and rights of others (especially those holding the sociopath accountable) whilst aggressively protecting his or her right to do anything without being hampered by social norms or legal requirements
pursues endless vindictive vendettas against anyone perceived as a threat or who attempts, knowingly or unknowingly, to identify or reveal or expose the sociopath, or who makes efforts to hold the sociopath accountable
is adept at appropriating rules, regulations, procedures and law to manipulate, control and punish accusers regardless of relevance, logic, facts or consequences
persists in and pursues vindictive vendettas using self-evidently false evidence or information, even after this is brought to the attention of the sociopath
will often manipulate minor bullies of the Wannabe type (who on their own might or would not merit the label 'serial bully') into acting as agents of harassment and as unwitting or
unwilling conductors of vendettas
is adept at placing people in situations where the sociopath can tap into each person's instinctive urge to retaliate in order to use them as his or her instruments or agents of harassment
gains gratification from provoking others into engaging in adversarial conflict
once conflict has been initiated, the sociopath gains increased gratification by exploiting human beings' instinctive need to retaliate - this is achieved by encouraging and escalating peoples' adversarial conflicts into mutually assured destruction
revels in the gratification gained from seeing or causing other people's distress
when faced with accountability or unwelcome attention which might lead to others discerning the sociopath's true nature, responds with repeated and escalating attempts to control, manipulate and punish
is adept at reflecting all accusations and attempts at accountability back onto their accusers
is adept at creating conflict between those who would otherwise pool negative information about the sociopath
has no limits on his or her vindictiveness
the need to control, manipulate and punish develops into an obsession with many of the hallmarks of an addiction
is skilled at mimicry and can plausibly and spontaneously regurgitate all the latest
management jargon
exhibits minimal professional skill level and competency
exploits his or her intelligence to excel at talentless mediocrity
is always identifying the behaviours and strategies to which other people respond with the desired effect
is able to anticipate and credibly say what people want to hear
is easily able to win people over before betraying them or deceiving them or ripping them off
easily manipulates and bewitches an immature or naive or vulnerable or emotionally needy person to be their spokesperson or agent of aggression
exploits anyone who has a vulnerability
is pushy and extremely persuasive
is sexually inadequate and sexually abusive
is likely to protect anyone accused of or suspected of sexual abuse of pedophile activity,
and will frustrate or obstruct investigations into that person
maybe associating with, or actively involved in, abuse or pedophile activity
has no emotions, no emotional processing capability and no ability to understand other's emotions
is incapable of understanding, initiating or sustaining intimacy
the male sociopath has often convinced a string of women to feel they are in love with him and despite being treated abominably they blindly continue to be loyal to him and minister willingly to his every demand
may start projects with apparent enthusiasm and energy but quickly loses interest
frequently takes unnecessary and uncalculated risks but takes no account of consequences
is reckless and untrustworthy with money
is likely to be illegally diverting or siphoning off significant sums of money to his or her own budget, project, account or cause
is unreliable and untrustworthy in every facet of life
is likely to be leaking confidential information or secrets to third parties
is likely to have committed or be committing criminal or near-criminal offences, eg fraud, embezzlement, deception
is likely to have committed or be committing breaches of harassment and discrimination law, employment law, contract law, etc
disregards rules, regulations, Health and Safety requirements, professional standards, codes of conduct and legal requirements, etc
cannot comprehend the deeper semantic meaning of language and is thus unable to understand or appreciate metaphor, hyperbole, irony, satire etc (these elicit either zero response or a hostile response)
likes, seeks, enjoys and relies on procedure, ritual and ritualistic practices
through arrogant overconfidence takes increasingly risky chances and eventually overplays their hand or makes a mistake which leads to the sociopath revealing him or herself
exhibits parasitical behaviour, takes everything and gives nothing
grabs headline credit for minimal, flukey or other peoples' success whilst surviving off the backs of manipulatees who are exclusively blamed for all failures
rarely blinks, may have stary scary eyes that cut right through you, or may avoid eye contact completely
is callous, cold and calculating
is devious, clever and cunning
is ruthless in the extreme
regards people as objects and playthings to be discarded when surplus to requirements
displays zero empathy
completely without conscience, remorse and guilt
malicious and evil
The interior of Francis Bacon's studio
